This summer has truly changed my life forever.

 (from a student AMH2020 online summer)

This summer has truly changed my life forever.

I am forever grateful for have taken your class and as long as you teach I will continue to recommend you to anyone that has to take American history. For my mission I chose to join you on a Thursday to go feed the veterans. I mainly chose this for my mission because 

 

A. I wanted to meet you and B. 1I just figured it would be the easiest thing for me to do, little did I know that day would change me forever. I met the most incredible people that day one of them being you, Dr. Soldani. I met people who have way less than me, but do not complain about it. People that are so happy and grateful for that hour or two that they got to share with us. Those people that have sacrificed so much fighting for our freedom. I had so much fun singing and sharing a dinner with the veterans. It was so interesting talking to some of the veterans and hearing all of the interesting stories they have to tell. 

 

After the dinner that Thursday night I went home and shared my experienced with my husband. I told him how much I wanted to do more stuff like that, how maybe I could probably try to make it once a month to one of those dinners on Thursday. He just listened, I thought he just thought I was crazy. A couple of days passed by and he said, “remember the other day you were talking to me about trying to do something nice for someone or getting involved in some kind of selfless act.” I thought to myself wow he really listened to me. My parents- in- law live in a very poor small two. My father- in- law is the pastor of a small church in this very poor town. Well my husband and I decided to once a month on a Saturday afternoon have a huge potluck luncheon for these very poor people that can barely afford food. We spoke to my father-in-law and he was very excited by this a couple weeks after that Thursday dinner with the veterans we did this for the first time on a Saturday. That day was so amazing people in the town were so grateful. They shared their stories and struggles a couple were actually trying to figure out what they and their kids would have to eat that day because they had no food and the asked God for a miracle and we were their miracle. The tears I shed that day could probably make a little lake. It was a very special and magical day. We are planning to drive down there and do it again. My father- in- law loved it so much he actually took this on as a youth project for the youth at our church and they are doing it every Saturday. My husband, the kids and I only join them once a month because we do not live that close to them so it is kind of hard traveling every weekend. I also cleaned out my closet, something I refused to do because I mean I just wanted to hoard all the clothes I have. So I cleaned my closet and my kids toy room and I spoke to my mom and had her find families in the churches in Miami or people just getting here from other countries like, Cuba, etc. and I donated all the clothes and all the toys I cleaned out. So I inspired my mom, cousin, and some of my friends to do the same. So now I am always trying to help everyone I see. The other day coming out of Publix there was this homeless man asking for some change because he said he did not have anything to eat. I truly had no change, but I went inside Publix and bought him a Publix sub and a bottle of water. He was speechless he thanked me so much and said to me, “my buddy has a bad leg and he is going to be so happy when I show up with dinner for the both of us.” He thanked me a bunch of times and then took off. 2It feels great to make a difference. It feels so good to know that even if it is just for one day you have made a family’s life a lot easier and gave them one less day to have to worry.

I have learned so much this summer. I always knew that money does not buy happiness and that material things do not buy happiness wither, but I have never experienced it firsthand where I can truly say I met people who were truly happy and grateful and had such a positive attitude towards life regardless of not having even half the stuff I have. I am so grateful for my home, everyday food, air conditioner, hot shower, kids and husband. That day with you made me realize that we need more people like you out in the world. Thank you for doing what you do and for showing me that I also need to get involved. Do not top making us do these missions because you opened my eyes to the fact that actually doing something for someone without expecting anything in return is so fulfilling. I hope many more in our class got to experience that. I can honestly say that not only did you make me a better person, you made me a better nurse. I always cared for my patients, but now more than ever I love what I do and I care for my patients in a much deeper way. I plan to continue to do these selfless acts and I hope my children also learn to do so as well. I will keep in touch with you Dr. Soldani because I most definitely will join you again on a Thursday for another dinner with the veterans. This time I won’t get lost, I will be there on time!

Help Thy Neighbor

 (from a student in my online 2020 class summer 2015)

Help thy Neighbor

Part 1 I had been struggling on what I could possibly do for this mission assignment, until one day recently, my mother informed me that our neighbor, who also was my 8th grade science teacher six years ago, had to have major surgery for a hip replacement. Since she lived by herself and owned a very big dog, I figured this would be a great opportunity to not only help out Ms Jannazo with an act of kindness and compassion, but would also be a great mission for my class project.

After Ms Jannazo had her surgery she had to stay in the hospital a few days and then they sent her to a rehab facility where she had to learn to use her “new” hip to stand and walk again. I visited her a few times at the rehab facility and asked Ms Jannazo how I could help out. She asked me if I could stop by her house and feed and walk her dog Bella which I was happy to do. Now to better understand how hard it was for Ms Jannazo to be in a hospital bed for 2 weeks let me provide a little background information about her prior to having surgery. From knowing Ms Jannazo as I said previously from the 8th grade, she was the type of person who would love to talk all the time and was always on the go. And when I say “on the go” I mean, she would either be training for some running event or riding bikes and sometimes swam pool laps. When she was not training for some sporting event, she was usually shopping or at the movies or socializing with someone somewhere. So I knew being laid up in that hospital bed would be hard for her and drive her crazy. So I figured instead of just feeding and walking her dog which would have been the easier mission to do, it would also be nice if I went to visit her in the hospital and help her pass the time. From the looks of that hospital, there was not a whole lot of stuff to keep a normal person occupied let alone a “high tempo” person like Ms Jannazo busy. The first time I visited, I brought a deck of cards and we would play and talk and she said it helped take her mind off the pain of her hip. She taught me how to play a new card game, called “gin rummy” which she defeated me in many games. We even played “heads up” on the Ipad and we would laugh so hard it made her have to get up and use the bathroom, which was a good thing because the doctor said she should try and get up and walk as much as she could stand the pain. When it was time for me to go, I could tell she was kind of sad because then all she had was her TV. As I walked down the hallways I would look into all the other patient rooms and noticed many of them were alone just laying in their beds with no one there to talk to them. I would feel sad that so many elderly people had no one to visit them.

Part 2 As I walked out of that rehab hospital I felt really good that I could make Ms Jannazo smile and forget about her pain for awhile and all it took from me was some time out of my daily schedule. Sometimes we get caught up in the “hustle and bustle” of our daily routines and we don’t realize that someone is laying in some hospital room just longing for someone to stop in and say “hello”. I wondered then if visiting elderly people and just spending time with them could make the difference between life or death for the people who had no family or friends to visit them. It made me remember back in 2010 when I went to visit my Uncle Joe in the hospital in New York when he was dying of cancer. When my mom, brother and I walked in his hospital room and he saw us the nurse said she had never seen him smile so big. We visited with him the whole week and the nurse said he looked better than he had in months. I learned more about him in that short week in the hospital then I had ever known previously. He shared stories about his younger days from the time he worked for the United Press as a photographer and how he got to be in the locker room with the New York Yankees and the time he almost drowned in a swimming pool when we was a young boy. Unfortunately a week after we left to come back to Florida he passed away. The nurse said he died peacefully and I wonder now if it was peacefully because we came and spent time with him just talking and laughing about old times. I realized then the next time I visited Ms Jannazo I would make an effort to try and look into each room and just see if there was any patient who just wanted to talk about their day. I challenge each of you who may read this story to make a concentrated effort to give just 1 day a month and visit your local rehabilitative center, an elderly home or maybe a veterans hospital and just spend a couple of hours walking into a few rooms and get to know some of these people who have great stories to tell and wisdom to share. And in these days of hard times, maybe just take the time to talk to a stranger sitting on a bench or standing on a corner. You talking to them just might make the difference of whether that someone has reason to believe in themselves and lives another day!

The Week There Was Singing at Veterans Village

 (from a student in my AMH2020 online summer class)

 

The semester began just as any other had.

As an employee of the State of Florida using the tuition assistance program, I was left to choose from the courses with seats left open following the general enrollment period. As was typical, my selections were limited and the courses required for my degree that were also offered as “online only” were rapidly narrowing. Upon searching the options, the dreaded AMH2020, (follow-up to 2010, the one and only course in which I received less than an A) reared its ugly head. The choices of professor were Dr. Powers and Dr. Soldani-Lemon. Although Dr. Powers is quite qualified, he led the afore mentioned class in which I did not fare well, therefore I chose the only alternative. The course outline seemed simple and the assignments appeared completely doable in the allotted time; all but one. Dr. Soldani required, as a condition of ten percent of the grade, a secret mission, one that would require active participation and potential monetary contribution. As a full time employee with a career that requires travel, a father of two, and a small business owner, I thought “who has time for this?” and “how can anyone require such a feat as a condition of grading for a course that is supposed to be ‘online”? I struggled with the concept, among other factors, but reluctantly made the effort to comply anyway.

As a veteran of the US Army, I found Dr. Soldani’s Thursday night Veterans’ Village Dinner to be the most appealing and achievable. Time is a luxury that I do not often possess. I juggled appointments and opportunities to serve and was able to settle on the evening of June 18. The assignment was to provide, bring and serve a dish for up to forty people from the posted menu theme. The theme was Cuban. My course selection was dessert. Although not exclusively Cuban, I decided on banana pudding. After all, banana pudding is a universally acceptable dessert option. On the evening before the dinner, I prepared five nine by thirteen trays of homemade(ish) banana pudding. The next day (dinner day) I carried to work, enough dessert to feed a small army. As my work day neared its end, I made preparations to make my way over to the “Village”. Considering I had no clue where I was going, I left a bit early. I managed to arrive at the Village about thirty minutes early. My first reaction was somewhere along the lines of “am I in the right place?” and “what am I doing in this part of town?” I must admit I was a bit nervous about some of the “characters” I witnessed strolling about. I observed some of what I know now to be residents move about the property, stopping to socialize with other residents. Emily was the second student to arrive. We sat and chatted for a few minutes when a resident approached. Emily asked about the location of the dinner and, although the gentleman was unsure as to what she was referring, he led us to a second floor apartment that had been converted to a community activity center. As we brought in our groceries for the dinner, Dr. Soldani arrived. Now this was a pleasant surprise. Dr. Soldani was not some stiff, strict professor type with a stick up. well you get the point. Her aura was that of the average, down to earth, fun loving, lay-person with a heart for people in need. One could tell Dr. Soldani was not handed a successful life on a silver platter. She cared for others as if she’d walked in their shoes. She greeted everyone who crossed her path with a decorative box filled with pretty rocks, each symbolic of a positive element of success. The stone that selected me was said to be symbolic of change. Each of the resident veterans was invited to reach into the box and each that did was selected by their stone, representing such concepts as love, change, prosperity, and strength. Some of the veterans sincerely appreciated the gesture while others seemed to be taken by surprise and some even responded with rude comments, by which Dr. Soldani was not fazed. She continued to distribute the rocks with sincere joy.

Other students arrived amongst the residents. This event was slowly evolving from a dreaded “lest get it over with” event to a tolerable comingling of complete strangers. Dinner soon ensued. The buffet of delicious treats included curry chicken, black beans and rice (which is excellent together with the curry chicken), arroz con pollo, chips with Cuban dip, Cuban bread, pastelitos con mango, guava and queso (thank you Anaisis for these delicious treats), and of course the banana pudding. As food was served and residents departed to consume the bounty, the line appeared motionless. For every departure, there appeared another arrival. As we served, we conversed amongst each other as students and with the veterans as they passed though. It quickly became evident just how appreciated these dinners were. The residents, it turns out, are military veterans who have reached the bottom. They were homeless, jobless and struggling with sickness, hunger, addiction, and mental concerns brought on by war experiences. The program allows, for a period of time, a place to live and eat and programs to aid in job placement and training, allowing them to get back on their feet. These veterans are typically accustomed to being shunned by the general public and considered a burden to society. Those having experienced previous dinners arrived with jubilant expectation, almost akin to a child on Christmas morning. They seemed to look to Dr. Soldani as a mother or a saint provider. Each veteran that passed through graciously thanked each of the students for participating.

Although many veterans passed through, a few decided to stay and break bread with us students. One in particular (his name escapes me) completed his meal and took to the piano. His playlist was random and singing somewhat off key, but his performance commanded collaboration. His joy and exhilaration compelled others around him to participate. The whole room seemed to break into song. Other residents joined first. As the music continued, students began to join. Dr. Soldani, who proclaimed to never sing publicly, even joined the chorus. At one point I even found myself belting out a note or two. Eventually, we were all laughing and singing and just having the best time, as if we were in a room full of family without a care in the world. Later in the evening, as the non-resident attendees began to filter out one by one, I said my good-byes and departed, leaving a room still roaring with music and laughter.

As I reflect upon this experience, I realize that with my hectic lifestyle I, like so many others in today’s busy world, tend to forget those less fortunate. Veterans who have selflessly served their country are often looked upon as bums and vagrants. So many of them need nothing more than a helpful hand to lift them up, an ear to listen or someone just to let them know they matter. I also realized that we tend to neglect our social responsibility to interact with people outside of our normal routines. More often today than ever before people stick to their routines, especially the older and busier they become. Society suffers tremendously from a lack of physical contact and face to face social interaction. This assignment I was initially so reluctant to participate in has renewed a desire in me to help others in even the littlest of ways. I have also been reminded to make time to break from tradition and out of my comfort zone to meet and interact with complete strangers from time to time to let them know they matter. You never know when a simple “hello” may just be the kind word someone needs to decide good over bad.

1Thank you, Dr. Soldani, for this experience and this opportunity to make a difference in some lives. I am better having met you and have met some other amazing people along this journey.

Mack's Angel Wings

(From a student in my AMH 2020 online class summer 2015)

My Mission Up until now, I never gave the idea of death and illness much thought. I always figured that long lives outweighed the number of shortened ones. My sister works at a children's hospital. She suffered with childhood disease and decided to work at the hospital she spent many of her childhood days in. For my "good deed mission" I spent a day volunteering at this hospital. I was told to go to patients rooms and bring them cheer; reading to them or coloring or acting silly, whatever worked to make them smile. I never visited my sister when she was hospitalized because I was a kid myself and they didn't allow kids to visit much, so being there was an entire new experience for me.

Right away, I didn't like it. It had that cleaning product hospital smell and felt sad even with the colorful decor. Immediately, I felt a sadness for all the kids that had to be there rather than being outside, carefree.My sister works on the Neurology floor but I was allowed to visit a couple of the other floors so I did. I started on the floor that was for patients with digestive issues. There were mostly preteens and teenagers on this floor, all suffering from some sort of eating disorder. It surprised me to see a few teenage boys on this floor because I've always associated eating disorders with females so that was my first eye opener of the day. Because they were older they weren't really in the mood for "silly stuff" so I just sat and chatted with them about all the real big world issues like Kanye West’s new sneakers coming out and Kim Kardashian’s new pregnancy. We also listened to music.

Teenagers, ill or not, are usually moody so strange visitors are not really wanted by them; I was not welcomed by all. Their food trays were all calorie calculated and the ones that refused to eat these trays of burgers, fries and milk shakes had a feeding tube that went up their nose. My next stop was the oncology and hematology wing, the saddest stop of my day. This was the floor my sister came to know well when she was a child. Kids, the youngest ones still in cribs, having to fight cancers and other blood related diseases. Even adults have it bad when they have to battle cancer but a child?

There were a few rooms I wasn't allowed in because the patients had bone marrow transplants and germs were a big issue. I met a little girl, I'll call her Mack, and she was the sweetest little girl. Mack was born with a tumor they didn't find until it caused her problems at 4 years of age. She was now 6, her face all puffy from the medications and all her hair gone but a huge smile on her face. We colored and I made funny puppets with blown up latex gloves but I think it was my voices that were the funny part for her. Her parents looked tired and distant like they couldn't remember a time before this when things were good and all was right in the world.

I felt really bad about it all. Bad for all these parents having to deal with a child that might die and bad for all the children that have been robbed of a normal childhood and maybe even a life. It made me realize how fortunate I am and how precious health really is and no one in good health ever really thinks of it because they expect it to remain good. They take all these things for granted when so many wish for lives like theirs, free of disease and doctor visits. Free of limitations and just freedom in general is had by all those in good health unaware of this freedom they have. I never realized that until my visit here. I also thought about how stupid people are in general for how they think they've got it bad when they have no idea what bad is. A buddy of mine was going through a breakup recently and he made it seem like there was nothing else more tragic than someone breaking up with you.

He could clearly use a day volunteering at this hospital to get his mind right.

My last stop of the day was the Neurology floor where my sister was working. She brought me around to her patients rooms for introductions. The ones I watched Mickey Mouse Clubhouse with were epileptics. They were regular looking kids, teaching me the hot dog song, that I will forever remember; “Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog.." Thankfully, I didn't witness any seizures. I did visit two rooms that didn't need my smiling expertise but I went in for the introductions. One room had a teenage boy who's parents were holding a bedside vigil. He originally just had a headache and fever and now the doctors said he was "gone" but his parents refuse to accept that idea. His mom told me she fully believes he's still in there and she's not giving up. I'm not an outwardly emotional person but that hit me hard. Imagine having to make that choice for your child, I don't even have children and I don't think I could let go either.

The second room was a very hard room to be in. There was a young boy who had no skull on top. Doctors had to remove it after he was in an accident because he had so much swelling of the brain. It was all sunken in. This boy was a patient of my sister's so I was in the room when she was checking up on him.

The top of his head moved like a water bed when she moved him slightly. I was really afraid she was going to break him or something even though she was very gentle. His mother was in the room, another strong woman, as all the mothers I met that day were. She too believes there is hope for her son to recover. I drew a picture for him that she put on the wall because his wall was full of drawings and pictures for him to see when he "wakes up"

I chose to come to this children's hospital because I wanted to see what my sister endured as a kid. 1I went home that day emotionally drained and it had only been one day. These parents and children have to go through it every single day of their lives. My mission was successful, I managed to make every patient I met smile and forget where they were for a minute and I learned a lot in the process. Simple acts of kindness to those around you cost nothing and can make a difference in their lives. You have no idea the battles people are facing everyday and if you can help ease that with something as tiny as a "hello" what's stopping you? That 10 second hello is pulling them out of their funk long enough for them to see they're not alone. I learned that life is precious and so is your health and you should appreciate both if you're lucky enough to have them. People today are so stuck in their lives of minor issues that they can't see the big picture. Smile, be grateful, be present, if these kids and parents can do it every day, all the more reason that you can too.

Side Note: My sister has since informed me that Mack has earned her angel wings. She was smiling till the end and there is some peace in knowing that. I’m happy I was able to have that special time with her and bring her some cheer while she was here.

"..he would see different top secret papers every day, but could not find a job..."

 (From AMH 2020 Summer 2015 Online Class)

 

For my community service, I chose to help prepare a meal for veterans. 

 

I made 5 pounds of uncooked spaghetti. Afterward, it weighed at least ten pounds. I didn’t think anything at all about my food. I didn’t think that my effort to help feed them just this one day out of the week was amazing. The veterans were so happy, so appreciative. Each time a veteran passed me, they said thank you. Most times, a simple gesture such as holding a door open goes ignored. These veterans risked their lives fighting for this country.

What I learned from them is that time and unforeseen occurrences are very real. These veterans had different stories. Some had no jobs, cars, or even an education.

I found it amazing how one veteran said he would see different top secret papers every day, but could not find a job. The country was built upon people giving up freedoms and helping one another. Now days, we barely pay attention to the persons on the side of the road. In order to better ourselves, we have to give back to the community, give back to the world. Helping just one person a day can easily lead to everyone else helping just one person.

 Before you know it, we have exponentially changed the world.

Do You Believe in Love at First Sight?: Laughing Yoga Frog Q & A

(From AMH2020 Webclass Spring 2015)

Is the laughing yoga frog real? Do you actually have it in your office?

Ask me again when you read the end of the book ;-) 

Kidding.   Not Kidding. 

OK, Kidding. Yes the frog is completely real. The frog lives with Alex. Literally. In his room.  I have other frogs in my life now.

I enjoyed hearing about the Laughing Yoga Frog’s life with you. Would you have written this story even if the situation had not happened with Alex? 

I wrote the first 2/3 of the book to give to my Mom for Christmas because I hate shopping (hate) (hate) and then I shared it with Alex and his Mom for Christmas too, and that’s when Alex’s Mom asked me if I had the picture with Reggie and the Frog.  Then the rest of the story happened and I finished writing the book and added the subtitle and added Alex as my co-author because this story belongs to both of us.

I can tell you were really inspired by Alex, do you still have a relationship with him?

I haven’t seen him since he left Tallahassee about 18 months ago. His Mom tells me but he lives in a great new place. I plan on talking to him in the next week.

 Did Alex ever get to follow his dream of doing theatre at Florida State?

Not yet. And I don’t want to speak for him, but I ‘m 99.99999% sure he would love if someone could make a play or shoot a small film out of this book

Why did the professor not want Bugger it in the first place? Why was she so against it?

Sometimes you just don’t like something. I’m far along enough in my journey to recognize what I like and don’t like, and I didn’t like that frog.

If the Prayer of the Yoga Frog meant so much to you, why didn’t you purchase it the first time you saw it?

I wasn’t looking for a new frog in my life.   

I like how this story is from your perspective, but in third person, it gives the book a fun fairy tale/story book quality, what made you decide to write it this way?

Yayyy! I like that you liked it. My first book, Marvin’s Book, was about a student who passed away, and I wrote every page with tears in my eyes. This book jumped out of me this way, froggy and all.

How do feel about the silver frog that was given to you by your family? You weren't feeling it at all when you first got it, but implied toward the end of the book that those thoughts may be changing.....just curious if the existing one will ever be as magnetic and magical to you as you described the yoga frog as being.

That frog lasted one semester. I brought it with me to tell the students the yoga frog story and how the frog was now with Alex, then we took pictures with Bugger but OOOOPS I kept dropping Bugger.  So my students and I took giggling pictures with broken Bugger. Then I threw him away.

How is Bugger doing? Has he helped you jump forward in life?

Dead and no.

Is "Bugger" the new frog you take pictures with now?

Nope.

Does Alex know how much his book inspires all types of people after reading this book?

That’s a question for Alex to answer, I’ll pass that on to him ;-)

What happened between Reggie and Alex? Why did Alex have a hard time forgiving Reggie?

I only know this pieces that I know, so I will write a little then pass this on to Alex for his response, OK? From my understanding, over the past year Reggie was convicted on multiple counts and paid full restitution.

Do you believe at love at first sight?

Yes. I believe that even if you walk away once or twice, love will still find a way.  

If you gave the frog away, so you believe that the meaning of the frog will find its way to as many people as you have shared it with?

Yes. I sent the frog out to the universe to live a bigger life than it could live if I held it down and tried to keep it with me.

How long did you have this Frog before deciding to pass it on?

Clarification: For the record, I didn’t "decide to pass him on" -  I was semi-frog-jacked. I had the frog about 5 years.

Was the purpose of the Laughing Yoga Frog intended to give Alex hope after the incident?

A tiny bit of it yes, but the main reason I write stories is because I love writing, and because Alex and I had such a good time. 

Have you ever thought about getting a real pet frog to keep in your office? ;)

No. I have plants that I love very much and play music for. Also, last year I read over 100 books my students assigned me, and in the middle of book #50 I went to the pound and adopted a puppy. But no, I never thought about keeping a live frog hostage in my office. That would make me sad, I would want it to hop out and make friends. 

Did Reggie put Alex in the wheelchair or was he already in one?

Alex was born with cerebral palsy.

What did you family and friends think about your book, Prayer of a Laughing Yoga Frog?

This story sums it up. I got the email saying my book published while I was at Outback Steakhouse. The waiter was an ex-student who had taken a picture with the Yoga Frog. I start getting all excited and teary eyed and my waiter is jumping for joy and my kids are like "that's nice" and asked for more honey butter. The hardest part of writing this book, of any book, is probably letting it go, being done and making room in your heart to move on to the next story. I wiped my tears of joy and ate what little honey butter the kids left me and then went to Target and bought toilet paper because I’m the mom.  

Do you still have the tradition of giving the rocks out after the final?

Yes!!

Were you ever really able to forgive Reggie’s actions?

Yes. Entirely and absolutely. That’s how I roll. I really hope to see Reggie one day and wish him well on his path. I hope he moves forward in grace and wisdom and uses his life to help other people. Maybe one day he will end up with the Yoga Frog, live a blessed life and laugh at it all. That would be a truly happy ending.

Do you always do things the way your heart speaks to you to do them?

Yes. I’m crazy like that.

Diet Coke Rock Bottom

I remember my first Diet Coke. It was 1985, and we hit it off immediately.  I was a teenager that always felt fat and always felt hungry. Diet Coke promised to be part of skinniness, something to help push the hunger back.

It worked (sometimes) and besides that it kept me super bouncy, like Tigger from Winnie the Pooh.

Over the years, Diet Coke was more than a companion.

 It was more than cheap and easy refills at Circle K.   

 It was an excuse to go somewhere (I need a Diet Coke and also…).

It was dance partner.

 It became a currency in my life. Ex: I thought of you and brought you a Diet Coke, now would you please...

It played hide and seek with me during lecture.

It made me happy, it made me laugh.

There was no one moment that made me say stop.

Maybe it was something magic in my lucky rock that was helping me let go of things that didn’t serve me anymore.

Maybe our relationship had just run its course.

I didn't have to hit Diet Coke Rock Bottom, which I imagine is something between kidney failure and running out of gas on a dark road because you spent your last dollars making sure you have enough Diet Coke for tonight and tomorrow morning.


For whatever reason, I just wanted to see what would happen next in my life if I gave up Diet Coke. So I did.

I didn't go through withdrawal, I didn't lose my mind and spit pea soup. I didn't hide Diet Coke in wine bottles and sneak sips of it with dinner.

I just let it go and now I am able to sit quietly. 

Except that right after I gave up Diet Coke, the universe sent me an Apple Watch and wearing it is a full time job. It tells me when to stand, how much effort counts as “exercise” and evaluates my overall usefulness to humanity. 

 In between driving the kids in circles and marching around as my Apple Watch mandates, I curl up on the sofa and follow links from medieval art into digital libraries and click around until the sun fades and my watch tells me to get up and move around (seriously, it cares so much that it totally controls me, this isn't a problem, right?). 

I read chapters of books that bore me, followed by entire books that made no sense at all but were more interesting than watching people get all excited about blending things into a puree on home shopping channel.

The only time I have been tempted to have a drink was last week at our dinner at Veterans Village when I found myself face to face with an entire line up of former loves -- Coke Zero, Diet Coke, Caffeine Free Diet Coke.  I scooped ice into a cup and walked away, leaving the drinks to bless other people.

Remember THAT, young lady!

We serve the Veterans every Thursday,  and since my students seem to have this covered quite well tonight, I didn't bring jambalaya and instead brought my shiny silver treasure chest of lucky rocks.

The Veterans - like most people - were thankful for the gesture, if not the actual gift, and took childlike pleasure in picking their lucky rock. 

Some took minutes to decide, others closed their eyes and grab one quickly.  There is no wrong way to get a lucky rock.

After they pulled out the rock, we discuss what it means and what blessings it might remind them of --- this for wealth and abundance; this for love; this for freedom; another one for creativity; another one that helps you let go of things.

The first rush of people to dinner was trickling to and end when I offered a rock to very well dressed gentleman I had not met before.

Unlike every single other person I've ever offered a rock to, he said no.

OK, he didn’t just say no, he shook his head and put his hand up rebuking me, declaring I cannot accept your rock! do you know who I am?

I introduce myself (I'm Melissa....I'm here with my students... I was just sharing these pretty stones sir….)

He pulls a faded, laminated card from his leather wallet that has names and titles written in exceedingly perfect handwriting in faded brown ink.

 Without my glasses I am helpless and so I look from the paper back to him.

 He tells me he is ordained and he cannot accept my magic and that I should be reminded that God is only in spirit and in nothing on earth.

While he tells me this and backs it with scripture (I try to follow, I really do - ) several people pass by and enter the dinner. I want to step away, excuse myself and offer the rocks to the other people. 

He has me half cornered and tell me about the real problems in society today - people don't care about each other, people are all out for themselves. He tells me it was easier in the military, easier when you knew where you stood. 

People streaming out of the dinner pass us by, gesturing thanks and bye, and I barely squeak out "see you next week!" and I can tell other people have questions for me,  but it would be rude to leave my friend. 

I close my treasure chest of rocks and give him my full attention until he sees someone he needs to talk to and walks away.

The last thing he told me was to remember that everything on earth, everything visible since the downfall of Adam and Eve was evil and that's why God is going to destroy it all. Remember that, young lady, he said, pointing his finger at me.

I remember.  But I don't believe it.

At the end of the dinner there are still rocks left.  I pick up a rock that is so  perfectly beautiful it seems to be glowing. This rock has been waiting patiently for me for millions and millions of years, refusing to be picked by anyone else until this moment.

 I tuck it by my heart and make room in my life for more blessings.

 (continued)